Stardate 03Juni2009, Orion Belt QuadrantToday, Rebel sources blamed yeterday's setbacks on faulty photon torpedo initiator crystals.
"Right from the get go, our squadrons had problems with their weapon systems," stated an disgruntled Ursa Major. "Every time we attacked we had malfunctions."
Despite sound tactics and a huge increase in Rebel recruitment figures, battle after battle was lost due to substandard cracked dylithium crystals procurred under government contracts.
"We suspect the batch of defective crystals was left over NC-1101 stock from the Klingon wars," an anomynous staff supply sargent disclosed. "Dilythium crystals radiate in six major wavelengths, " he explained. "As they age, overheat or are damaged the so called "luck of the dice" vascillate between the first and second wavelengths instead of the proper oscillation in five
or six wavelength range."
All of the squadrons routinely had vascillations in the lower ranges. It is suspected that the Hutts were to blame for the inferior crystals. Their capitalistic zeal is legendary and they will go to any length to to make an extra profit and undermine anyone faction who gets in their way. "This is
not speculation," retorted Ursa Major, "how else could they recuit vast numbers of mercenaries turn after turn? In our rush to find the Emperor (who was rumored to be hidden on an outpost far from the major engagements) we relied on dylithium smugglers whose mercenaric sympathies lie with PeetZa. Obviously they had a better offer from the Hutts and made out from both sides."
Ursa Major was criticized for spending too much of the meager Rebel resources protecting the important belt of resource planets that he couldn't mount an effective hunt for the Emperor. It is rumored that he was heavily sedated and distracted by nefarious Nationstar Intergalactic and Planetary Mortgage Company whose underwriters secured bases for the Rebel movement.
_______________
Remarks from Peetza da Hutt:The first question has been answered. Ursa Major has relinquished his status as Galactic Dominator to a most unworthy Successor. Peetza de Hutt took over the galaxy in brilliant fashion. In game one, ten resource planets were secured on Peetza's very first turn. In game two, it took a bit longer as it was turn two before Peetza could rest easy with ten resource planets cowering under his iron fist. At least he was holding a piece of iron in his fist.
Here come de Hutts! Here come de Hutts! Order in the Galaxy 'cause here come de Hutts!
_______________
In summary, Peetza da Hutt won the first two games in near record time. The third game was called a draw after exhaustion set in.